Tanka is Japan's oldest poetry form. Traditionally a tanka has five lines with 5-7-5-7-7 syllables. In English some count syllables and some just have short-long-short-long-long lines. If you know haiku, you know half of a tanka. Unlike haiku, tanka encourage feelings and emotions. Here is the place to try out a new poetry form. Give and get feedback on your poems.
Ella's made some excellent suggestions, Trish. You're off to a good start. I suggest you work on the rhythm, the meter, the musicality that is tanka ...
Lovely! I'll reflect on it some more after I turn in ...  her brush strokes the paper evenly her thoughts otherwise hidden from me  Ella ... ink on rice